


is it so wrong, that you make me strong

by alvisable



Category: Monsta X (Band)
Genre: Alpha Chae Hyungwon, Alpha Son Hyunwoo | Shownu, Alpha/Alpha, Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Alternate Universe - Teachers, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Eventual Smut, M/M, Mutual Pining, Non-Traditional Alpha/Beta/Omega Dynamics, Teacher Chae Hyungwon, Teacher Son Hyunwoo | Shownu, denial!Shownu, other characters mentioned briefly, past Hyungki because they are THAT ship fufufufufu
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-09-08
Updated: 2021-02-11
Packaged: 2021-03-06 23:28:13
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 7,110
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26357224
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alvisable/pseuds/alvisable
Summary: Hyunwoo had always known how captivating Chae Hyungwon was, how beautiful and dedicated the younger was, how he deserved the world and even more. Hyunwoo admitted it, would describe how perfect the man was without a doubt if being asked.The only problem was, Hyunwoo never expected himself to be attracted to another alpha. And the more he denied his feelings, the more he felt the inevitable gravity pulling them together...
Relationships: Chae Hyungwon/Son Hyunwoo | Shownu
Comments: 7
Kudos: 27





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> I should've finished my other on going fic first yeeeet, but I just want to post something, so alpha!Showhyung it is. ;w;
> 
> I hope you can enjoy it! 🥺🐻🐢💞

The first time Hyunwoo saw Hyungwon was on the day he first came to this school, entering the teacher’s office with a wide beam on his face, a charming aura drifting around him.

Hyunwoo was sure he was staring pretty much like an idiot, especially when the angelic being extended his hand to Hyunwoo and introduced himself. His eyes gleamed, his voice deep and somehow melodious. It wasn’t long until the younger’s image—from the way he looked to the way he talked—had been imprinted on Hyunwoo’s mind (though he probably shouldn’t let it happen).

The second time was a bit more spontaneous and rather out of the blue.

Hyunwoo had just finished his practice with the students from the dance club as their coach, and he was about to close the gym when he found the door to the equipment storage room left open. He approached the corner of the gym, swinging the door gently, only to find someone crouching inside, his knees hugged tight on his chest, face buried in his arms.

“Hyungwon-ssi?” Hyunwoo called, reluctant, but he couldn’t possibly leave someone inside alone and cause them to get locked for the whole night, could he? He slowly walked closer to the new teacher, shaking his shoulders to wake him up, yet Hyungwon only looked up at the hand touching his crumpled shirt. Turns out that he was not really sleeping—he had been crying silently, his tear-streaked cheeks were enough evident of it.

“Hyungwon-ssi, are you alright?” Hyunwoo tried to give a calming reaction, his expression thoughtful. Hyungwon might probably have gotten into an argument with some delinquent students, or some teacher had scolded him, or he might have other problems not related to school stuff at all. Hyunwoo wished some beta teachers would be around to comfort Hyungwon instead—since they were all such professionals when it came to this kind of interaction. Yet, most of them had gone home once the bell rang, and Hyunwoo currently only got himself.

So he sat beside the younger alpha, staring at the shiny wood floor, with various balls carefully situated in some racks and the rest piled neatly around it. Only the soft hum of the air conditioner was heard, and it was getting too awkward, the air around them thick with tension. Hyunwoo got a whiff of acrid fragrance coming from the other alpha, it was bitter, strongly sickening. He kept it to himself and it was then when he realized it was Hyungwon’s distress signal.

“Do you want to tell me what’s going on?” Hyunwoo asked after the extended silence. He didn’t expect Hyungwon to reply. They were not that close to be sharing each other’s problems or secrets, even just simple stories. He just thought that maybe he could help lift his burden a little. It’s what colleagues did after all. “You don’t have to if you’re not comfortable, obviously. Just know that... you’re not alone in this.”

Hyunwoo gulped, he was never the one to talk to other people, especially if the topic revolved around deep stuffs. He often hung out and relied on Minhyuk, the biology teacher, to do most of the chit chat. Minhyuk got along pretty well with everyone—even Kihyun, the senior teacher’s son who was very strict and resembled whatever an alpha usually had. Hyunwoo, on the other hand, often feared he might be too clingy towards Minhyuk, although fortunately the young omega never sent him any complaints.

Either way, talking to a person who happened to have a bad day or some sort was never Hyunwoo’s expertise. There was always a possibility that he might say the wrong thing, that he ended up offending the other party—which he certainly wouldn’t want to happen in this exact situation. He had spent his first year of teaching coming off as this awkward being, and he wasn’t particularly proud of himself around that time. If that was what happened too to Hyungwon, he hoped he could comfort him a bit. That yes it would take some time, but he would come around and get pretty much the hang of it.

Hyunwoo looked at the younger again, who ducked his head although he had stopped crying. He was breathing slowly, and Hyunwoo took it as a sign that Hyungwon at least felt a little better now. He glanced over, more closely this time, searching for signs if the younger felt under the weather and just needed help to go home or something. The only problem now was, Hyunwoo wasn’t sure if he should keep talking or just stay silent until Hyungwon wanted to go home.

“If... if you’re feeling unwell, I can accompany you to the infirmary. Hoseok _seonsaengnim_ would know what you need,” Hyunwoo finally said, hoping to get some response, even just a little nod or a shake of his head.

Instead, Hyungwon reached for his wrist, gripping it tightly. “Can... can we wait for a little longer before we go?” The new teacher requested, his voice deep and a little hoarse. Hyungwon gulped visibly as he stared at Hyunwoo for the first time since the older guy found him, the word surprised would be an understatement to describe his reaction. Hyunwoo’s gaze was soft, almost penetrating but probably it was because his curiosity was taking over, and Hyungwon felt oddly warm. Something he probably shouldn’t have experienced in the first place.

“I—I promise I won’t be long,” he offered again, as Hyunwoo hadn’t replied and kept staring back at him. Hyunwoo should say something already, considering he was quite talkative a few minutes ago.

Instead, Hyunwoo only blinked and finally nodded, his cheeks puffed up as he smiled, looking a little tired from the practice he had done a few minutes ago. “I won’t go anywhere, Hyungwon-ssi.”

The sun almost set when they left the school’s gate, its radiant light offered a reassurance that it wasn’t that late. The younger didn’t talk anymore after that, and they went home in complete silence. Hyunwoo’s hand was no longer in Hyungwon’s grip once they left the gym. They parted ways in the bus stop with Hyungwon waving his hand timidly. His heartbeat quickens at the adorable sight, though Hyunwoo immediately blinked that thought away and waited for his own bus to go get him. He convinced himself that the warm spreading on his cheeks was nothing more than the sun and the hot temperature’s doing. He probably still felt the remnant of working out the whole day tiring him out, so it was pretty normal to have such reactions.

He was simply tired, and his heart couldn’t know any better.

* * *

Hyunwoo met the younger several times after that, but it was too brief since Hyungwon seemed to be in a hurry to go to his next classes. They rarely met in the teacher’s office. Their encounters were only crossing paths and nodding to each other whenever they noticed the other’s presence in a close range. Hyunwoo might only imagine it, yet it felt like a second nature to recognize Hyungwon even before he saw him physically.

Hyunwoo wouldn’t be lying that he found Hyungwon... attractive, for lack of better words. The man was practically breathtaking, everyone seemed to admire him—not that Hyunwoo couldn’t relate to such an experience. Still, he felt it strange to be _curious_ about another alpha.

He probably just wanted to talk with Hyungwon, to get to know him better—as friends. Other than Minhyuk, he talked with Kihyun and Hoseok on a daily basis, and it wasn’t just usual small talk. It was an actual conversation, lasting more than ten minutes, and Hyunwoo felt a sense of closeness even if they weren’t necessarily best friends materials. He did the same with other teachers, though the frequency was less than the time he spent with the three teachers he often talked to.

Hyunwoo sighed, watching his students almost finish their laps as a warm-up. His mind wandered again. Deep down inside, the memory of them holding hands in the gym flooded his brain. He probably was just curious of what was going on, right?

Once his students gathered again, he whistled to get their attention, then moving on to the core lesson of the day. He instructed some of them to pick the basket balls from the net they’d brought to the fields, while the others made two lines facing each other. At least, giving instructions and concentrating on the lesson at hand could distract him from the image of certain someone, even just a bit.

* * *

The third, _real_ encounter occurred when they were invited to Nam Dawon and Son Juyeon’s wedding. Dawon was an English teacher at their school, and Juyeon was Hyunwoo’s cousin. So it was no surprise Hyunwoo got invited both as a colleague and a relative.

He had known Juyeon and Dawon dating for quite some time and he was genuinely happy for both of them. Also, the fact that both women were alphas had caused his heart to flip a little. Hyunwoo was not necessarily a traditionalist, he would welcome everyone’s life choice with no prejudice. Though to see such possibility in his own life—to have an alpha as his romantic partner in the future—would be another matter altogether.

The reception was held in a banquet hall in a hotel near the financial district and subway station. The decoration was romantic, with a delicate chandelier installed in the center of the room. The soft hues from the lighting illuminate the florals in every corner of the room, as well as the vase on the rows of white tables.

Hyunwoo had been sitting in one of the tables with his parents and two other cousins before, now they had gone to other tables to chat with other guests. His colleagues would arrive in no time, and he was tempted to drink another wine, or get another portion of lobster with mashed potatoes, or just keep it moderate. He contemplated the choice when two arms wrapped around his shoulder, a cheerful voice calling his attention.

“Hyunwoo-ssi! Have you been waiting for us?” Minhyuk hugged him tightly from behind before walking around the table to face the older. He wore a navy blazer with no shirt beneath, one point of the button is tucked across the other side. The loose chinos pants accentuated his casual choice of tonight, and before Hyunwoo could say anything, a finger snapped in front of his face, breaking all his distracted thoughts.

“Enjoying the view much?” Kihyun stepped aside and led Minhyuk to sit one chair away from Hyunwoo. He wore the usual black tie that made him look formal yet elegant, and his narrowing eyes seemed intimidating behind his glasses.

Hyunwoo cleared his throat as he regarded the other guys—Hyungwon sat on his right side, his face nonchalant and seemed uninterested with Kihyun and Minhyuk’s now growing banter. Hoseok was on the other chair, and there were two other younger guys Hyunwoo wasn’t familiar with. One seemed reserved and mature, the other looked energetic and talkative. Must be his friends’ plus ones.

He didn’t realize how long he’d been quiet when Minhyuk called him again, introducing the guy—Jooheon—as his neighbor. The young man smiled at Hyunwoo before saying, “When Minhyuk hyung offered me to go with him, I immediately said yes. Thought I could have some free food around—ooph!”

“Jooheonie!” Minhyuk scolded as he kicked the younger’s shin, then smiled apologetically towards Hyunwoo. He then regarded the other guy as Changkyun, Jooheon’s roommates whom he brought along as Hoseok’s companion. “If Dawon-ssi required some eligible reasons to bring more people, we’ve all come prepared.”

“I’m sure she wouldn’t mind,” Hyunwoo answered quickly, moving slightly when the waiter served them seven glasses of wines. At some point, his back of hand accidentally stroked Hyungwon’s. It sent a jolt of sparks on his skin, and Hyunwoo immediately pulled his hand away, looking at Hyungwon who smiled politely at him. And Hyunwoo honestly didn’t know how to react.

Calming himself as subtle as possible, Hyunwoo offered, “There are some self-serving buffets around, if you guys want to you can help yourself.” The others didn’t wait long until they scattered to said buffets, with Minhyuk trying his best to hold his drool and Kihyun walking in tow. Hoseok was more polite, leading Changkyun and Jooheon to the other direction. They left Hyungwon with him, who sipped his glass slowly as if he took the most of his time.

Hyunwoo still wasn’t sure what to talk about. His mind busy searching for decent topics to say, though it only grew irritating as he couldn’t muster up anything. He then let himself relax and started, “You look fresh.”

Hyungwon quirked an eyebrow, glancing at Hyunwoo with an amused smile.

_Dang it, did he just say something stupid?_ Yet his reply came before Hyunwoo could conjure up alternative questions.

“Just fresh?” Hyungwon tilted his head, fixing his grey blazer with a slight pout, then running a hand through his hair with a matching color. The lapel has beautiful cursive motifs, and it was only then when Hyunwoo noticed him wearing a satin black choker around his delicate neck.

_Shit,_ he shouldn’t ogle Hyungwon too much, it had become unhealthy.

“What a shame. I was right, though. Minhyuk is a tough competition.”

“Min—?” Hyunwoo’s eyes widen, words suddenly escaping from his brain. Did Hyungwon just flirt with him?

“Hyungwon-ssi, Minhyuk and I are only friends...”

“Says the one who can’t even get away from Minhyuk even just for a day,” Hyungwon cut quickly, and Hyunwoo wasn’t sure if he was joking or not. Hyungwon just admitted he had paid such close attention—either to him, or Minhyuk (would be more logical if it was towards the latter, but who was he to complain). It felt too sudden, too surreal. Hyunwoo was afraid his face would give away how his stomach currently fluttered, and how his brain almost went into mental fuzziness.

“I think there has been some misunderstanding,” Hyunwoo said, smiling calmly at the younger who now spinned his glass aimlessly. His heart palpitating wildly yet he forced himself to school his expression to look neutral, going along with whatever Hyungwon was playing with him. He was internally nervous as fuck, but he thought that it might not hurt to find what the younger wanted from him. “I could give a more decent appreciation, if you’d like.”

“More than just ogling your subject of interest in front of everyone?”

Hyunwoo’s smile almost faltered. Hyungwon was not whatever he thought before. He was bold, right to the point, his eyes held no self-doubt. The crying mess he had witnessed the other day was nonexistent, and he found himself awfully fascinated. Although, Hyunwoo somehow managed to keep his cool. He wasn’t sure if he liked where this was going, so he just shrugged, masking his own clumsiness. “One couldn’t be too selfish, I guess.”

Hyungwon chuckled. “But seriously, everyone seems to think you have something going on with Minhyuk.”

Hyunwoo couldn’t help but chuckle as well, he would burst out laughing if he didn’t remember where he was currently at. Embarrassing Juyeon in her wedding day then getting scolded later on was his very last wish he had in the world. “Hyungwon-ssi, I could assure you that Minhyuk is not my boyfriend. And no, I didn’t ogle him in whatever way you think I did. He was clearly dressing up. I wonder if he finally realized, uhm, someone’s feeling for him.” Mentioning a name wouldn’t seem too right now.

“Let me guess, you actually root for Minhyuk to realize Kihyun’s yearning for him?” Hyungwon lowered his voice when he asked this, leaning closer that their heads almost touched.

Hyunwoo stayed back a little before he nodded. He blinked, both from the question and their sudden proximity. “What? You don’t believe they’ll make it together?”

Hyungwon sighed, looking desperate. His eyes stared at the empty glass, and Hyunwoo couldn’t help but observe his gaze, feeling how lost Hyungwon looked even when he might just have no idea what to speak again.

“I have no idea which one is more dense, you or Minhyuk.”

“Maybe you can find out,” Hyunwoo murmured before he could filter his mouth. He was too surprised to take anything back now, and he hoped he didn’t do any dumb move.

Hyungwon suddenly snapped his head, his previously sad smile turned into a mischievous smirk. “Is that a challenge?”

“Or you could wait in a line for the most dense person in the world after Kihyun and Minhyuk,” Hyunwoo offered, his tone amused as well as encouraging. He drew another chuckle from the younger alpha, it was as melodious as he remembered the guy’s voice the first time they met, his useless heart now at Hyungwon’s mercy.

“I think I like you already,” Hyungwon stated, then stood up and left, joining the others who had enjoyed various meals for a while.

And that particular sentence was exactly the death of Son Hyunwoo in his twenty seventh year of life.


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I really hope that I could write faster and churn out more words lmao, but I hope y'all would still enjoy this!! >w< 💞💞💞

Hyungwon was at the brink of a horrible mental breakdown that day. It was only two weeks since he came to the school, and already the students in his class decided to bail his lesson.

He wasn’t fit for this job, he should’ve been somewhere else pursuing a more suitable career, probably as a software developer, or an accountant, or an archivist—anything that had nothing to do with so many people at the same time. He could as well try to be a radio DJ or a fashion designer—it wasn’t like Hyungwon hated _all_ people per se, and those jobs were literally lucrative as heck. He just didn’t find his pupils interesting at all, and that feeling seemed to be mutual.

Too bad his parents asked him to choose this path, since he could take it slow, lay low, hold up his parents’ reputation from his terrible record at keeping his nauseating scent at bay. He had taken a break for two whole years after high school, busy maintaining himself, trying his best to cool his body down. Hyungwon didn’t exactly remember how many omegas had been shoved down his throat for the very first months of his so-called “training”. It had been exhausting at best, stressing him down at worst.

Now, he was stuck being a frigging teacher. It was tiring, yet he kept holding on because this was the only job his degree could afford, which offered stable income, and had kinda been in his comfort zone after being drained out of the scent therapy or whatever-sugarcoated-terms his parents had thrown at him.

And before he set things right with his own life, dealt with his shit and just went with the flow, the accident happened. Like his past training/therapy was for nothing! How could he possibly know that on that particular day, of all the weeks and months and years he had spent questioning his decision, would be the peak of his frustration?

He had been in a class full of disruptive students, none even bothered to listen to him, let alone paid close attention. He had gritted his teeth, warned them with almost a growl—once, twice, even thrice and still they wouldn’t budge. He tugged at his collar and unconsciously emitted his cloying scent out—it happened whenever alphas were irritated, and his scent was particularly thorny and itchy.

The whole class erupted then. Hyungwon quickly hid his neck in a flurry—his original one was supposed to be heavily sweet, floral type kind. Yet when it came to his anger management, the unpleasant scent could’ve gone out of control. He was literally a walking double-edged sword—his scent could be sweet and sour depending on the circumstances. And he hated himself for having to experience this in front of people— _students_ —whom he should impress rather than disappoint.

“ _Saem!_ ” One of the girls, who was also the captain of the class and had been quiet the whole time her classmates were noisy, raised her hand to get his attention. “I’ve called our homeroom teacher. He would be here in a minute.”

 _Their homeroom teacher? They mean Kihyun? Oh, no. No no no._ Hyungwon’s breathing had gone erratic and his pulse racing wildly. His fingers went numb and it had accidentally enhanced the current scent wafting off the room, half of the students had scurried out and the rest stayed while covering their noses.

It was the worst day of his life.

Those students were unfortunately obedient only to Kihyun. With one deadly glare, it was inevitable not to be quiet. Kihyun had also added that if anyone was found being disruptive again he wouldn’t hesitate to send all their grades down in a trench. Continuing to the next grade with perfect scores be damned.

Being defended by another teacher was obviously embarrassing, but Hyungwon couldn’t particularly save his own face. He swallowed the remnant of his pride hard as Kihyun dragged him outside, straight to the infirmary. Hyungwon halted midway, saying he wanted somewhere more secluded, a place that had little possibility of other people coming, so the school gym it was.

Hyungwon inhaled and exhaled the fresh air deeply once they were alone and sure no one was near their range to hear anything. Kihyun had let go of his hand and it immediately felt like... well, honestly, he didn’t even know what to feel anymore.

“Gosh, I don’t like you seeing me like this.” He ran his hand through his hair, pressing his lips as he massaged his temples. He sniffed a bit and flinched when he sensed his natural fragrance still lingered around. “Fuck, it left a trail.”

“Hyungwon, please mind your language, you’re still at school,” Kihyun hissed, his tone calm but also stern, his eyes flickered with worry. The younger teacher looked pale, and his breathing still ragged. Kihyun could just leave him in the infirmary to rest for a bit, and probably drink some scent neutralizer. Any alphas with the same symptoms have the general dose, a teaspoon of red syrup, and as a precaution, it wouldn’t hurt.

But Kihyun knew Hyungwon didn’t like being seen as weak in a place as public as a school.

“It was the worst, Ki.”

“It wasn’t that bad,” Kihyun was quick to counter, though it wasn’t enough to soothe Hyungwon, not even close.

“I should be able to contain it, it’s...” Hyungwon gulped, unable to bring himself to say it. Not under Kihyun’s gaze, not when he stared at him with such deep concern like Hyungwon needed saving. Like he needed protection. Worse, that particular stare was the kind that always impaired all Hyungwon’s senses. His synapses stopped working, his blood stream rushed, his rapid heartbeat the only functioning organ.

A hopeless response, yet Hyungwon couldn’t necessarily suppress it.

“It’s okay, Hyungwon-ah.”

Hyungwon sucked in a noisy breath, his lips pursed as he avoided Kihyun’s gaze completely. “It’s not okay,” he retorted. “It’s... it’s unsightly of me.”

“You’re not unsightly,” Kihyun said after a moment of silence. “You just need to know how to handle your students. They can be a lot to manage, sometimes. Just... survive for a little more and then you’ll get the hang of it, yeah?”

Hyungwon only nodded and let Kihyun go once the older said he needed to attend to his students, and said that Hyungwon could stay there as long as he wanted. He found the equipment room later, deciding on crumpling inside as his mind wandered and dwelled on his past with Kihyun. It was meant for mere distraction, yet his brain conjured more than just the thought of them being best friends yet seemingly, unfortunately still like that until now.

Kihyun was known as a guy with a strong will, but to Hyungwon, Kihyun was always more than that. He was his best friend since childhood, one of the closest people he could always rely on, his first love— _damn,_ probably even _still_ the love of his life.

It didn’t mean that Hyungwon wasn’t happy seeing Kihyun pursuing someone he found dearly. If anything, Hyungwon wanted to support Kihyun just as much as how the other had always done the same to him. But sometimes it was too painful to be close when Hyungwon knew they wouldn’t be more than friends. Worse of all, Kihyun recognized his feelings and had rejected Hyungwon with his calming and caring demeanor.

His train of thoughts started to twirl out of control as a drop of tears rolled down his cheek. He gulped, brushing the tears with the back of his hand rather harshly. It was embarrassing. He was at school and had a mental breakdown for two separate reasons, something any professional teacher wouldn’t have in the first place.

Besides, Kihyun had proved countless times that their friendship was genuine, and that him staying close to Hyungwon was nothing near a consolation prize.

If anything, Hyungwon should worry more about his future career instead of getting distracted by his little crush on his best friend. He realized this, fully, and his aching heart got even more crumpled than ever before.

That was when Hyunwoo came, his steps careful and hesitant against the hardwood floor. Hyungwon didn’t dare to peek a glance because it would give away his puffy eyes, and if it wasn’t the right person who checked on him then Hyungwon wanted to at least look presentable.

Hyungwon was glad Hyunwoo didn’t pry into him at all. Instead, the man was rather comforting and understanding. He actually felt safe, and strangely, he was looking forward to their future interaction.

Unfortunately, Hyungwon was busy for the following weeks. He calmed himself and tried a more civilized way to handle Kihyun’s students, making a deal of what they could and couldn’t do in his class. None of them even apologized and Hyungwon decided to just brush it off. What could he expect from a bunch of delinquents, anyway. He was anxious about encountering them and staying with them for two whole periods, two days in a row. And since the progress was quite significant and the learning process was more efficient than the week before, all Hyungwon hoped was to get out of school and relax.

Probably also to meet Hyunwoo, though it seemed that their schedules were never matched.

Not that the older teacher was looking forward to meeting Hyungwon, anyway. Hyungwon didn’t want to bother him in any kind of way, and so, the following weekends went by in vain.

That night, Hyungwon didn't particularly know what he was thinking. Seeing Hyunwoo, of all people, _ogling_ Minhyuk was... a kind of disappointment to him. Probably Hyungwon was being selfish, wanting everyone—well, a _certain_ someone—paid attention to him, preferably as dedicated as Kihyun had been towards Minhyuk. It’s not that Hyungwon wouldn’t support his best friend’s ultimate happiness, he wasn’t petty nor malicious like that. He just wanted some distraction. And if the potential person wasn’t even interested in him, then what’s the point.

Hyungwon blurted out whatever came to his mind, basically to get Hyunwoo’s full attention. It might be a pathetic attempt, but surprisingly, it worked. Hyunwoo was stunned during his whole speech, his bold advance at closing their distance to the point of almost touching. How Hyunwoo’s beautiful eyes widened as Hyungwon slightly pulled back, like he didn’t even want to get away from Hyungwon in the first place.

Which was flattering, really.

“I like you already,” Hyungwon said, then smiled, and went to where everyone gathered to enjoy their food. From his peripheral vision, he saw the older alpha shaken, and he probably should feel guilty. Hyunwoo was a highly respected teacher and of all occurrences, he didn’t deserve this.

But, well, Hyungwon couldn’t hold himself back. A little part of his heart was convinced there could be more between them, even if it was only a little fling, and that it might be over much sooner than a blink of an eye. Yet, Hyungwon was desperate. And if Hyunwoo was game for it, Hyungwon had no objection than to accept.

He was by himself for a while as he settled in with a sweet, delicate-looking banana pudding after that—which turned out to cater to Hyungwon’s taste. He was about to taste another bite when Kihyun nudged him from the side. He jolted as he slowly regarded the older. He instantly smiled at the sight of Kihyun, although it was a bit strained as Hyungwon knew what he was looking for.

Kihyun raised his eyebrow, demanding the answer he desperately wanted yet had no courage to ask it himself.

“I wonder how you manage working with both Hyunwoo and Minhyuk and couldn’t even muster up any courage to ask the simple question.” Hyungwon snorted, pulling his hand away when Kihyun tried to take the pudding in his hand to have a taste. The older man pouted but not for too long.

“So?”

“They’re not dating, Ki.”

“Are you one hundred percent sure? Not even engaged?”

Hyungwon sighed. As much as he loved his friend, he sometimes couldn’t put up with the way Kihyun kept getting too perfectionist—and this one was for a simple thing! Not to mention he was on the winning side!

“Hyunwoo and I couldn’t decide which one of you and Minhyuk is the most dense,” Hyungwon said, not really in a reassuring way as he was supposed to provide. Or probably that was what he hoped for, that Kihyun would give up on Minhyuk already so he and Hyungwon could have a second chance.

Which was ridiculous. Hyungwon knew that deep down in his lucid mind.

Upon seeing Kihyun gritting his teeth and folding his arms, Hyungwon giggled and nudged the older back. “Come on, you’ve been pining for centuries, it would be a waste if you don’t confess soon.” His eyes wandered throughout the hall, then spotted Minhyuk talking with Jooheon in the nearby booth. He waved once Minhyuk noticed him staring, gesturing to him to come approach them.

Kihyun obviously panicked, but Hyungwon pretended not to see that. His beaming smile was wide that the curves might split his face, and Minhyuk returned that smile just as wide, expecting Hyungwon to talk.

“Kihyun has something important to say,” Hyungwon chirped, patting Kihyun’s shoulder to show his support then winking at Minhyuk. He strolled away from the scene, right when a soft music flooded the room. His steps turned awkward mid-way, but then he found Hyunwoo staring at him from their previous table.

Hyungwon was standing on the dance floor amidst people who had begun searching for partners. The image was kinda off, yet Hyunwoo’s eyes were expectant. He chuckled, then walked towards his direction in a brisk pace, looking eager. The man finally stopped and offered his hand, asking Hyungwon for a dance.

Hyungwon’s mind went blank again as he glanced back at Hyunwoo. He bowed a little and looked so exquisite in his suit. His hair was smooth, styled and combed sideways—a normal hairstyle for formal occasions. Yet, seeing him this close, and with that _handsome_ , illegal look kinda sent Hyungwon’s brain into a fuzzy mode. And before he could bolt away to avoid embarrassing himself further, Hyungwon bowed back and held Hyunwoo’s hand.

Hyungwon’s cheeks tinted with red as his heart pounded at a light speed. The pudding was eventually taken away by one of the servers. And by then, Hyunwoo had gently placed his hand on his waist, the warmth spreading fast and Hyungwon’s heart drumming. Palpitating. A literal firework.

He had no time to think whether this reaction was due to him being saved from any embarrassment or because it was Hyunwoo, who now carefully guided his step sideways and carefully avoided other people who had started their dance a few minutes ago.

“I—I can’t dance, I mean, not in a wedding,” Hyungwon confessed, now swaying with Hyunwoo for a few steps, his hands visibly trembling.

“Then allow me to guide you, Hyungwon-ah.”

Hyungwon was too busy calming his heart when they started moving, afraid his grin looked silly, or that he gulped too much. Although, Hyungwon was grateful for the entirety of their dance. Hyunwoo’s steps were gentle and he was so patient leading Hyungwon across the room. And Hyungwon got the gist of it pretty easily. They laughed as the music shifted to another one, and they decided to take some rest.

“Sorry for the pudding,” Hyunwoo said, his tone genuine.

Hyungwon laughed, his voice low but soft. “I don’t regret it. It was the price I would gladly give away if it meant I could spend more time with a person as breathtaking as you.”

It was Hyunwoo’s turn to get flustered, and it was the best reaction Hyungwon could have ever hoped for. The younger kept chuckling at the sight as their hands still held each other’s, so dearly and tightly. And Hyungwon secretly didn’t mind that he was willing to do anything to get stuck in this moment for more than forever.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you very much for reading!! Kudos and comments would be really appreciated! ^3^ ❣️
> 
> And as always, let's keep loving Showhyung, the most beautiful ship in the entire universe!! 🥰🐻🐢💘💘💘


	3. Chapter 3

Hyunwoo was busy sorting his students’ questionnaires for their career plans before submitting it to the school counselor. As expected, some of them weren’t answering the questions willingly. And he decided to call them one by one tomorrow.

He was about to stand up and head out from the teacher’s office when two arms wrapped his shoulder from behind.

“Hyunwoo- _ssi,_ what was that all about?” Minhyuk asked in a teasing voice, his voice low so that he wouldn’t attract anyone’s attention. 

Hyunwoo startled nonetheless—Minhyuk could be unpredictable sometimes. “What are you talking about?”

Minhyuk untangled his arms and took a seat beside him. His eyes staring wide, focused, and a bit demanding. Especially when he continued, “Walking down the corridor together, saying goodbyes before classes, having lunch side by side... it’s like Hyungwon and you are _officially dating_ or something.”

Hyunwoo’s cheeks turned pink, his mouth agape. He cleared his throat as the words tumbling out of his mouth, “I-it’s not like that at all.”

“So what? You’re practically married now?”

The question didn’t help calm Hyunwoo at all, not even a bit. He avoided Minhyuk’s gaze altogether as he tried to calm his rapid heartbeat. _Is that how Hyungwon and I look like?_ he pondered, though he kept it to himself. No way would he let Minhyuk tease him more than he already did.

“He asked questions about you and Kihyun,” Hyunwoo retorted, his tone stable and he was secretly relieved for that. “If anything, you two are supposed to have such progress by now.” _Not Hyungwon and I,_ he added internally.

Minhyuk frowned at that. He looked genuinely confused, and Hyunwoo was afraid of what it might mean.

“What progress?” Minhyuk asked, tilting his head. “I’ve assessed my students properly, and most of them never mess up the laboratory’s equipment anymore. Plus, I’ve been doing well in the faculty meetings and the parents’ conference. Everything is fine, I’ve done nothing wrong. What kind of progress would I possibly need to look forward to, especially with Kihyun?”

Hyunwoo gawked in disbelief as the younger teacher continued ranting, describing more and more reasons as to why he and Kihyun were on good terms now. To say that Hyunwoo was frustrated was an understatement.

“Geez, Minhyuk- _ssi,_ give Kihyun a break already.”

“I have? I didn’t do anything wrong!” Minhyuk insisted, his brows furrowed.

Hyunwoo palmed himself, not wanting to deal with his “antics” anymore. Had Hyungwon told his friend about the fact that Minhyuk and Hyunwoo were not dating? What could possibly hold Kihyun back from confessing?

“I’ll go find Hyungwon, then. See if I can figure something out—”

Minhyuk perked up at that. “See, you’re already making excuses to meet him.” He smirked as he raised his eyebrows playfully, which Hyunwoo ignored because it was futile to make Minhyuk understand. Despite the heat creeping up his cheeks. Despite the rapid heartbeat he often experienced whenever Minhyuk teased him about Hyungwon.

Though, as he walked to the library’s direction where Hyungwon spent most of his free time nowadays, he wondered again.

Was he really just looking for excuses to meet Hyungwon?

If so, was it bad?

* * *

Hyunwoo found Hyungwon reading a book in one of the tables in the center of the library, some students were in front of him. The ones who sat nearby kept glancing over him, either admiring his beauty, or wanting a chance to ask some questions.

 _Not_ that Hyunwoo minded, _nor_ did he pay attention to Hyungwon’s physical features. The view just happened to present itself in front of his eyes.

Although, thinking a little— _so little_ —about that did some flip flop in his chest. He had to suck in a breath before smiling and walking confidently towards the younger teacher.

“Hyungwon-ssi,” Hyunwoo managed to say calmly, taking a seat beside Hyungwon that had been saved so that no one would grab it.

The other man lifted his head, then his brown eyes were literally glistening at the sight of Hyunwoo before him. “Hyunwoo _saem,_ ” Hyungwon greeted back, he smiled ear to ear before he fixed his gaze. He was captivating, and mostly breathtaking.

Hyunwoo wouldn’t say this out loud for the sake of keeping his calm persona at bay. Although he’s afraid his expression had given him away, long before his brain could think of any way to behave better.

“Have you waited long?” Hyunwoo asked, clearing his throat as he felt like they had been staring at each other like they were in a contest or something. “Should we go to a more private corner?”

Right when Hyunwoo asked the question, the students protested in a roar. His eyes widened in surprise, before he put his finger in front of his lips. He really hoped he could calm them down, in case the librarian would punish them for making a fuss, yet it came to no avail. Hyunwoo peeked a side glance at Hyungwon, asking for help, but the other alpha only shrugged as if the commotion had nothing to do with him.

“Alright, okay. I see you all have gotten along well with Hyungwon _songsaengnim_ , but don’t get too carried away,” Hyunwoo said, his stern yet friendly voice managed to grab their attention. He stood up then tucked Hyungwon’s shirt to do the same thing, then he focused again on the students staring at Hyungwon like he was an angel. “I only need Hyungwon _saem_ for a bit, don’t miss him too much.”

It caused another uproar, some teasing, some expressions of jealousy that Hyunwoo did that on purpose, to monopolize Hyungwon and didn’t give them the chance to talk for a bit. Hyunwoo just held Hyungwon’s hand to go to another table near the encyclopedia sections, distracting himself to the soft skin against his palm. Which only got worse because now the one who had such uproar _internally_ was Hyunwoo.

It was only normal to find students behaving in that kind of way. Though, considering how messed up he felt that day, Hyunwoo could only wonder how strange he had behaved around Hyungwon that made those students so worked up like that.

* * *

“They’re not Kihyun’s students,” Hyungwon said once they sat on a table behind the shelves of encyclopedia collections. He smiled at Hyunwoo, tightening their grip, hoping the older didn’t bother hiding his blush anymore.

It was hilariously cute, and Hyungwon felt like dying.

“Yeah, I figure...” Hyunwoo answered as he exhaled slowly.

“I went to their class as a substitute, mostly just giving Dawon-ssi’s assignments,” Hyungwon explained again. “I didn’t even teach them, yet they paid attention well and asked me questions. Dawon-ssi must have told them to behave.”

“Or you’re just a natural,” Hyunwoo offered, his voice genuine.

Hyungwon knew it was just out of courtesy, but he couldn’t help feeling proud at the compliment. His mind raced at the thought of Hyunwoo being used to pleasing others, knowing exactly what he should say, be it for charming them or for knowing them better. Then it dawned on him that Hyunwoo might be the type of person who took care of his, _ehem_ , partner very well. Whoever they were surely had such a happy life.

And Hyungwon silently cursed at himself for not asking whether Hyunwoo had someone special already. Then he regretted it even more for getting so miserable over something he had nothing to do with.

“Anyway, do you mind me visiting your place tonight? The deadline for mid semester scores is near, and I only need to complete one more class before it’s finished.” Hyungwon flashed a smile, gulping a little. He didn’t want to read Hyunwoo’s reaction wrong—that, if the older liked him _like that_. He also didn’t want to make Hyunwoo uncomfortable, they barely knew each other after all.

“Of course not,” Hyunwoo replied. “I’ll be glad to help. You’re always welcome.” The older alpha curved a smile, showing his chubby cheeks. And when his smile reached his eyes, they shaped like a beautiful crescent.

Hyungwon had no idea how a mesmerizing human like Hyunwoo hadn’t gotten any partner (at least, as far as he knew). Hyungwon would be lucky if he had a chance, though that didn’t necessarily mean Hyungwon deserved Hyunwoo...

“Why? Are you worried about something? Did Kihyun’s students cause you any trouble again?” Hyunwoo asked, snapping the younger out of his mind.

Hyungwon blinked as he felt his cheeks warming. It was just too hard to believe how calm Hyunwoo always seemed, as if reassuring that everything would be alright. As if he implied that he was willing to accompany Hyungwon no matter what happened.

“No, I’m okay.” Hyungwon shook his head, fiddling with his fingers to fight the urge to reach Hyunwoo’s hand then hold it. He already had had that chance before, it had been more than enough. He couldn’t be that desperate to have more physical contacts with the older, could he?

“Then I’ll be waiting for you.”

Hyungwon nodded, his cheeks reddened furiously at the caring tone in Hyunwoo’s words. He pursed his lips as his mind raced through myriad possibilities, his heartbeat overwhelmed his senses. He was hopeless. He knew this was merely a professional visit, yet he couldn’t help but look forward to their activities tonight. And worst of all, he didn’t know if he should resent it, or let himself get carried away.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This feels more like Showhyung simping without plot lmaoo ~~(if only there's additional tag like that!)~~ 🤭🐻🐢💘💖
> 
> It's been a while since I updated this fic and I really miss Showhyung so much. I just want to do all my AUs about them justice. :")
> 
> Thank you for all of you who keep reading and waiting!! It really means the whole world to me! >3< 💞


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